Monday, April 12, 2010

Longing for Heaven, but Enjoying the Present

Life with a chronic illness is hard. Having a body that doesn't work well can be quite frustrating. The Lord is teaching me to be content and to enjoy life despite its difficulties. Even while enjoying life, though, I long for Heaven. I long for the time when I will have a new body. A body that works!

There is a balance to strike between living here and now and longing for Heaven. I am very much looking forward to Heaven, but it is by no means a wish to leave my family. I would love to have a long life on earth, lots of time with my family and friends, and time to serve the Lord here with the life I have been given. Despite the physical challenges I face, I really do love life. I love being with my family. I love talking to my friends. I enjoy blogging, crocheting, and reading. I like to look at pretty things, and I like to make pretty things. I love to play, and I find a lot of joy in this life.

At the same time, though, I am sad that I can't still run, hike, and go rapelling. I wish I could do the cooking, cleaning, and shopping for Will. It breaks my heart when William wants me to take him outside, and I physically can't. I'm sad when Will and William go off to the zoo and I have to stay home. It hurts when I see my friends taking walks outside with their children and I am stuck at home alone. I miss out on a lot of things. I don't fit in with a lot of people because my life is so different. People don't get it. It hurts. Sometimes it hurts so badly that I just cry and grieve again what I lost.

I am so thankful for the life I have been given, and at the same time I look forward to Heaven when my life will be even better. While I am lying down on the floor playing Go Fish with William I enjoy that time with him. I cherish the moment, but I also look forward to the day when William and I will be able to run along the beach in Heaven. When I put my flowers in my flower pots I enjoy and appreciate the beauty that they add, and I have fun doing it, exhausting though it is. The small enjoyment I get in planting a few flowers in pots gives me just a glimmer of the joy that awaits in Heaven when I will have the energy to take care of a whole garden! I enjoy the flowers here and now, and I smile because I know that one day it will be even better.

Knowing what awaits in Heaven makes it so much easier to miss out on things here and now. If I didn't have Heaven to look forward to, then I really don't think I could truly appreciate and enjoy life. If this life was all I had, I would be a miserable mess. I would probably be angry, bitter, and depressed. While I do long for Heaven, I also appreciate the here and now. It is knowing what awaits in Heaven that makes this life full of joy and worth it all.

"For we know that our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all" (2 Corinthians 4:17, NIV). It is because of Jesus that I have hope and joy. It is because of Jesus that I can enjoy this present life.


  1. I'm glad you put this into a post!

    Paragragh number 3 is perfectly put! Feeling that with you!


  2. How true! I'm so glad I stopped by, this really cheered me up. Visiting from SITS. Have a happy Tuesday and come be sometime and visit me.


  3. That's the verse that came to my mind as I read this post. Heaven will be so wonderful and this life is so short in comparison of all eternity. What a good thought to focus on! Hope your pain is less today!

  4. Rachel, I don’t even know you but your blog posts always encourage me. Especially the ones like this. Why? Because you are honest. You are vulnerable. You are real. That’s biblical.

    Thank you for pointing us to Christ. Especially on hard days.

  5. Beautifully written post! Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!

  6. The last verse was the clincher. Dropping in from SITS, which seems to have more and more "shop blog" rather than people blogs. I like your blog. You are not trying to sell me anything.

  7. You know Rachel. somewhere someone is watching to see how you handle the situation your in...and you're doing a wonderful job of it. God will be glorified in the end when this person watching sees that your at peace with life.
    I moved my avatar up to the fronyt so you could perhaps visit my blog.

  8. I found you through Teresa at Too Many Heartbeats - through SITS.

    I love finding other Christian wifes & moms blogging. I have no idea how you deal with your disease and keep such a wonderful outlook! God has blessed me with you today!

    Also - as I read - Psalm 103 came to my mind. Bless the Lord for all his benefits...even in the midst of pain - he blesses us - and we should bless & praise him back. You are an awesome example of someone who does!

  9. This is so beautifully written. Thanks for sharing.

  10. What a wonderful attitude you have. Thanks for sharing.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...