Horses, Zebras, and Unicorns

 

I have a little story to tell you today. It is from nearly 30 years ago when I was new to life with dysautonomia. It’s a story I have told very few people, and I recently decided that it needs to have a place on my blog. 

I was diagnosed with dysautonomia as a teenager in 1996. My cardiologist told me that doctors are taught in medical school to expect horses, not zebras. You may be familiar with that analogy. It says, "If you hear hoofbeats, expect horses, not zebras." Doctors look for the most obvious answers and diagnoses first because those are most likely to be accurate. But some patients are actually "zebras." They are outside of what is initially expected, and their conditions are more difficult to diagnose.

However, my doctor told me that I didn't fit into either category. I wasn't a horse or a zebra. I certainly didn’t fit into what was expected for horses, but my body also wasn’t responding well to the treatment for zebras. She said that I was some sort of shade of gray in between, and, unfortunately, there wasn’t a clear course of action for treatment.

My mom relayed this to a friend, and the friend immediately replied, "Oh! She's a unicorn!"

And I kind of loved that. It sounded unique and pretty. Not messy and blah like a shade of gray. Not a fearful unknown, but something with purpose and beauty.

I still like it today. It reminds me that there is beauty in this chronic illness life. God created my body just the way it is, genetic conditions and all. He knit me together in my mother’s womb, and I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:13-14). My body is known to God, and He holds it together (Colossians 1:17). I praise Him for this beautiful life and this “unicorn” body that He has given me. And I thank Him that one day I will receive a resurrection body!

If you live with a chronic illness, and you are tired of being a horse, a zebra, or a fuzzy shade of gray, then maybe it would help to think of yourself as a unicorn! Let it remind you to take delight in the God who created you.

Photo by Kaylee Stepkoski on Unsplash